Cerebrum conundrum

Is there a Discovery channel show that would describe how the 14 year old brain works? Please?

I find it scary that my 14 year old is so close to being behind the wheel of a car and making X number of decisions every minute, but can’t make basic decisions at home that are successful. I want to put in my usual disclaimer. I love Sara and will always love her, but she is driving me batty.

I’m going to give you the scenario, but it is going to sound dumb and petty…not unlike other things I’ve written previously.

Me: Hey Sara. Please empty the dishwasher and load it again before you go to bed.

14 year old brain: Uh huh.

The first mistake is that I heard “Uh huh” and thought it represented a verbal contract. An affirmative answer of some sort. I now know that “Uh huh” in 14 year old language means “Whatever…just stop talking or bothering me. I’m not really listening to you.” The part that kills me the most is that not only did she obviously not do what I asked, BUT she also used dishes the next morning and stacked her dirty cereal bowl on top of the dishes I asked her to put away. How does a brain process something like this?

I thought this was only a “Sara thing” until I was driving home the other day and encountered another 14’ish year old kid on a bike. This kid was riding his bike in the middle of the road like he was on the ride at Disney, whistling “It’s a small world after all…” I honked at him to get out of the way and what do you think happened? He stopped in the middle of the road. Turned around and looked at me. Evaluated what I might be honking at him about and it took him like 30 seconds to realize he was in the middle of the road. I know this was the process because I saw his face change expression when it finally occurred to him what might be the problem.

I’ll talk to you guys later. I’m going to call some doctors and see if there are any studies being done. I have a brain to donate to them.

If it ain’t broken….

It was quite a show of drama here last night. Sam was playing his beloved Nintendo DS before bed and as I left the room I told him to quit doing X to it or it would break. Five minutes later I hear shrieking from upstairs. As I started the obligatory “Dad run” to where ever the fire is, I was met by Sara and Sam and two pieces of what used to be a one piece toy. The Nintendo DS. I’ve never felt so bad about being right. Sam was beside himself and Sara was sad because her brother was crying…you would have thought they were watching old Yeller. I only bring up this story for a few reasons. The first is…boy is it hard to get the logistics worked out with a call center as soon as they hear you aren’t in the U.S. The girl kept telling me I needed a U.S. address, a U.S. phone number, she would be sending me a mailing label only good in the U.S. I get it. Ironically she was probably answering the phone in the Philippines or India. The second, and most interesting note to come out of it is that Sara kept telling Sam that she would ask people to replace the DS for her birthday. She has a birthday coming up in June and she wanted to give up her birthday gift to make him happy. I don’t think I’ve ever been so proud of her. Sam, missing the point of the whole conversation, wanted to take the DS to the guy at the bike store. The guy at the bike store??? I quickly slipped in the “Guy who can fix anything” rankings into second place behind the bike store guy. I think I will take the game to the bike store guy. It’s the only way to get back my #1 ranking.

Awww….snap.

I thought I would update with a rare picture of me and Jen. I also have to add one disclaimer. I am happy. Some people have commented that when we have pictures of just the two of us, neither of us seem happy or are not smiling. The reason for this is the photographer. Again…I love Sara to death, but her A.D.D. affects her ability to take a picture. I’m not sure why, because you would expect an A.D.D kid to just snap pictures like crazy, drop the camera and run away to the next thing. In fact we joke with Sara sometimes about it based on this T-shirt.

We just say, “Oh Sara spotted a chicken.” When her attention wanders. When taking a picture, however, she sits, and sits, and sits, until just when you get irked enough to make a face at her, then she clicks. The results are pictures like this.

Jen has more patience that I do and managed not to make “the face” until seconds after the click. Love ya Sara, but “Take the damn picture!” : )

Scoop

Ok...here's the deal. Every once in a while I hijack this blog and get off on a tangent. I can't control it, things just occur to me. My latest realization is about my daughter Sara.

I've covered how I am inspired by my dad, how strong I think my mom is, how great of a wife I have, and Sam makes it into all the pictures as the cute 4 year old. Sara makes the cut a lot of times but I thought I would take a minute and share some Sara thoughts.

Let's get the disclaimer out of the way. Sara and I have our moments. I'm usually the jerky punishment guy who doesn't always have enough patience or doesn't "get it". Lately there hasn't been as many of those moments, but it isn't because I'm getting less jerky or patient. I think it might be because Sara is growing up. I would tell you not to tell her I think so, but it is probably inevitable that she comes across this entry. I'm proud of Sara all the time, but lately she has been stepping it up. Sara is currently getting all A's and B's while attending on-line school, and there are more A's than B's. This is good stuff, but Sara also attends school here in Norway for most of the day and reports that she has been answering questions in class that are presented in Norwegian. Sara has a lot going on in her life and without sharing her business here on this internationally read blog.....she is accomplishing a lot being away from her friends, in a foreign country, and just being 13. I'm proud of our Sara.

For those of you who know Sara....drop her a line at ursulabear@verizon.net, she would be happy to get e-mails and greetings.

Ok...back to normal Jon, er, well....the old Jon. Talk soon.