Ok…so I’m not funny

So we’re driving back from the hospital today when I decided to make a joke. Jen wasn’t looking and I yelled out “EEK! She was startled and asked me “WHAT!?”

eek

I thought it was funny.

Funnier still is that the license was a Rhode Island license from a car dealership near our old house in Warwick, RI. I had to take a picture. I wonder what the driver was thinking as he looked in his rearview mirror and saw someone taking a picture of his car.

Things that make you go, Hmmmm

This post is a problem for me really. How do I get to tell everyone how cutting edge I am and yet generate sympathy for the people involved.

First…my post: Posted 9/12/2009 – Home is where the cart is

Second…a story from the Huffington Post - Similar? - I think so

Stay with me people. The thoughts in my head are keeping you about a week to ten days ahead of the rest of the world.

Burnin’ down the house

Not quite a year into this blog and I’m at post # 361.

I will begin to prepare for the 365th post representing one hypothetical year of one post per day? Is that like celebrating an 8 month anniversary?

Green eggs and ham edition

Here are some things / people that I am mad at and probably shouldn’t be. Some of them don’t know I’m mad at them, so don’t tell.

The March of Dimes – How sad is that? They just won’t stop calling me and as much as I might want to give them 2 nickels, they won’t let me get a word in edgewise.

The mean girls at Sam’s school – Jen will like this one. There are two women who pick their kid(s) up and drop their kid(s) off at the same time as Sam, but they never say hi even when you say hi to them. They are mean. I’m going to take a picture of them and post it here so you can see them.

I don’t like my home owners association. They said my mailbox is too dirty. Their letter said that I shouldn’t take this as a criticism, but really? What is it then?

I don’t like the guy who stops by my house every once in a while and greets me with a “Hello neighbor!” and the proceeds to try to sell me the last of the steaks in his truck. True story.

I don’t like my desk. It’s too cluttered and it is impossible to keep clean.

I don’t like tomatoes.

You’re a teepee and a wigwam

Stop me if you’ve read this before…..

Did I already go on my rant about doctors appointments?

About a thousand years ago I went to the doctor. I had an appt. for 9:00 a.m. At around 9:30 I started getting mad and asked them what was going on. At 10:00 I called Jen and told her I was mad. At 10:30 I told the people at the desk that I was leaving…what happened after this made me think about how everyone is so programmed by circumstances that we no longer see what’s wrong when it is wrong. The people at the desk were astonished that I would leave. They couldn’t believe that I was leaving and were yelling at me to come back as I headed out the door. I called Jen and told her my story and she said “You can’t leave…it’s always like that at the doctors office".” Why? Would you go to an appointment anywhere else and wait for an hour? Hair dressers? Here’s a good example: Would you sit for an hour waiting for someone you had planned to meet for dinner or lunch? No way. You would think they were killed or maimed in a horrible accident if they didn’t arrive in the first half hour…or they would have called. There’s another difference. Have you ever waited past the appointment time at the doctor and had someone come out and tell you they are running behind or give you an update? Not on your life.

Everyone I talk to about this immediately starts making excuses for the doctor.

“Maybe there was an emergency” – Seriously. How many emergencies do you think happen in the course of a day at the general practitioners? I’ll tell you how many. Zero. For the sake of argument let’s just say there was an emergency. If your schedule is so tight that one event throws off the entire day and makes my 9:00 appt. a 10:30 appt. then we have bigger problems that I thought.

The reason that this problem continues to be a problem is for the following reasons:

1. – There is no customer service score or threshold for the medical community. There is no “on time” score for your doctor. Would you go to a doctor that had a 1 star customer service score and a 5% on time appt. rating?

2. – No one complains about this and if they do who do they complain to? The doctor? They have zero control over any of it. Their insurance company? Good luck with that. Right. There’s no one to complain to.

3. – People are scared of making their doctor mad. You don’t care if you make Tires Plus mad because they can’t get your car fixed in a reasonable time, you will just go down the road to Tires Extra Plus. People won’t even consider leaving their doctor. They have all the papers and all their “stuff”. Plus..they “know” us.

Ok…I’m done. Next time your are waiting for your doctor in the waiting room, and then again in the secondary waiting room, you can remember that I’m mad too.

Let’s all go to the lobby…

I’ll be back. Just taking care of Jen and the rest of the gang.

If anyone wants to guest post, let me know. I’ll send the invite.

Jon

Since you asked…

Many of you have commented on the references I have been making to Tampa General Hospital and my spending time there. Sometimes I forget that people actually read this blog and that it isn’t just my own comedic diary of sorts.

My wife, Jen, has made some very courageous and serious decisions that involve her attacking cancer before it attacks her. Every doctor we have talked to has indicated that, while they can’t be 100%, every indicator says that she would have had to deal with some form of cancer in the future. I don’t want to go into a lot of details since they aren’t mine to give, but she is on the final leg of this battle and will be recovering and going on to a long life of taking care of “her own self”, our kids, and her family.

Thanks for your words of support and concern. She is doing fine and is, by far, one of the strongest and bravest women I have ever known. Today the blog can be “We Love Jen”

Cyber-Surgery

Now that I’ve given Tampa General the business by busting on their in–house McDonalds I feel I’m obligated to give them credit for something.

They have this very cool system for the waiting room that gives updates on whoever you are waiting for. From arrival to the recovery room and throughout whatever procedure is being done they have the status on the TV in the waiting room. Now if you are like me I’m already thinking about how they can make it better and here are the things I have come up with.

1. – Pay per view surgery – let’s say you are bored watching the pretty color coded screen for some update and want some additional upgrade. They should offer up some video of ongoing, interesting surgeries. Who knows? Maybe they would inspire someone in the waiting room to go on to a medical career. I think it would drive down the McDonalds business however.

2. – Online betting on status updates – This one COULD take a morbid turn, but I think it’s worth looking into.

3. – Twitter / Facebook synergy – Maybe the surgeon could post some pics or one liners about what they are doing live and online. How cool would that be? Maye you could even pose questions to the operating room while the surgery is going on.

If you need a million dollar idea, just drop me a line. I have tons of them. I only ask for a modest return on my intellectual property.

One stop shopping at Tampa General

I’m sitting in the hospital making my observations for the day and I only have one that jumps out at me right away.

McDonalds

There is a McDonalds in the hospital. ??? It’s somewhat disconcerting to watch the hospital staff wandering in and out of the McDonalds here with Egg McMuffins, hash browns, and other stuff that they are probably fixing on the floors above the McDonalds. Maybe it is to keep the shareholders happy.

“See shareholders? We are committed to keeping the hospital open and profitable by getting money from McDonalds to operate here and keeping the flow of obese, heart patients coming in” I’m walking around trying to find the Hamburgler Heart Wing. I’ll let you know when I find it, but right now I’m going to get a Big Mac.

Is that Albert Pujols?

Since this is “We Love Larry” I'm contractually obligated to post a picture of him once per month. You should see the rest of the contract, it’s full of clauses like that.

cards

Wilma gets the bonus appearance here today.

Love you guys!

Like sands through the hourglass….

How hard can a sand castle be? We went to the beach yesterday and every time I go I have grand designs on building a sand castle with Sam. Sam has grand designs on everything else, but I will not be deterred. Here is my (our) creation from yesterday.

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This is before the walls were completed and I had fortified the defenses. Here was what I had planned to create.

sand-castle

My helper was more interested in knowing when we could knock it down.

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We had a great day. Same fell asleep on the way home at around 6:30 p.m. and woke up this morning at around7:30 a.m. I wish I could still do that.

Slowboat

I made an entry about my high school friend Dave Wells a while back. He’s living in China for 3 years teaching. Here is his blog about life in China and various subjects. His wife Jane is also pretty funny and they both write about their kids, their jobs, and all of the above. Check it out.

http://wellszawadowski.blogspot.com/

Larry update

I haven’t done one of these in a while, which in the scheme of things is probably good.

Today Larry and Wilma are heading off on a bus trip to St. Louis to catch two days of Cardinal – Cub baseball. He is a braver man than I am. I hate bus trips. Maybe I can convince someone to get some photos from this trip.

I think his health is roughly the same. He struggles at times with his breathing, but keeps chugging along. He has some follow up appointments coming up with his oncologist at the end of September, so the stress will ratchet up for a while. Visits like that only seem to be reminders of everything. I’m hoping to get them down to Florida during Fall and Winter when it is the nicest here, but we never seem to find an exact date. Anyone who reads this, and also talks to them, can ask them “Hey…when are you going to Florida?” Maybe they will get the hint.

More soon.

Just…”Sam”

Since there hasn’t been a lot going on I thought I’d just post a picture or two of Sam. He cracks me up. He doesn’t want anything to do with having his picture taken, but every once in a while he must think he looks pretty cool because he will tell me to take his picture. Today we put this hat on him on his way out the door to school and he says, “Get the camera”. This is what he thinks is cool.

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D-U-M

I think that I’m smart. You guys should know that, I write it here all the time. So why do I keep doing dumb things and in some cases the same dumb things I’ve done before? Is it some sort of human evolutionary glitch? A constant test of our level of usefulness? At some point I think I’m going to do the same dumb thing for the 50th time and something in the universe will be triggered and I will just disappear.

Dumb things I have done in the last week…most of them related to pool maintenance.

1. – Put muriatic acid in the pool in a haphazard way causing a cloud of acid to sweep through my pool cage…with me in the middle. I seriously almost dove into the pool to escape it. How’s that for a thought process? Escape the cloud of acid you just created by jumping into the area you just put the most acid.

2. – Opened the pool filter bare handed. This sounds tame enough until I tell you that it is made of fiberglass. I will now have red, itchy hands and wrists for the rest of the day. BONUS: This time I didn’t open it by taking off my shirt, wrapping my arms around it, and twisting…the wrong direction. This time.

3. – Twice this week I have jumped on my bike, looked at the sky and thought, “It probably won’t rain on me". Ummm…it rains almost every day here at the same time every day. Oooh…Jon…don’t forget to put your cell phone in you pocket so it gets soaked!

Ok, so it’s only 3 things for now, but we are only 3 days into the week. Two of them have caused my physical discomfort, so I’m headed in the wrong direction.

Do you want fries with that?

Realizing that I just published a dumb post about Chuck E. Cheese I thought I’d follow it up with a dumb post about pumping gas.

I guess I’m just impatient. I went to get gas the other day and it’s not like they make it very hard, you just pull up and put gas in your car really. I did, however, find myself getting mad at all the questions I was asked by the gas pump.

1. – Credit outside / Credit inside / Debit outside / Debit inside / Cash – If they had offered one more choice I would have had to get another person to help me.

2. – Pin #

3. – Zip code

4. – Do I want a car wash?

5. – What type of gas do you want?

6. – Do I want a receipt?

All of these questions keep me from having to go inside and do the same thing really, but for some reason it gets frustrating. I find myself talking to the gas pump. “I just want to get gas!” It never says anything back. Maybe that’s what I miss. I’m going to go in and pay next time and see if I am happier then.

See? Told ya. This is what happens when you have a place to write these things down.

Charles E. Ost – Part 2

I’ve had a good laugh or two at a web site that shows the advertising for certain foods and then the actual foods that they bought and prepared according to the instructions. I think they need to take this one step further. I saw an ad for Chuck E. Cheeses today and I laughed. It showed kids playing in a nice clean, non-crowded happy place and then the pizza was delivered by Chuck E. himself. I have never seen a pizza look like that at Chuck E. Cheeses, not that I spend a lot of time there. For those of you that aren’t customers of CEC, let me paint you a picture. Picture a giant warehouse of games and kids. Then picture 50% of the games being broken, the other 50% mobbed by 20 kids per machine and then notice the grime and dirt surrounding you. Don’t look down at the carpet and don’t even think of eating the pizza…unless you can resolve the differences in this picture.

real pizza ad pizza

Curiously I couldn’t get a good picture of advertised pizza at CEC. I know why after looking around a bit…they aren’t interested in advertising their pizza. That’s not what they are really selling. I’m too old to figure this out until I get most of the way through this post.

Here’s the web site for other, better, examples of truth in food advertising.

Food in real life

The reformation

I’ve discovered the solution to our current government debate! I actually discovered what the problem was and once everyone is aware of the problem we can all have a laugh and then move on.

The problem is the word “reform”. This word has many ties to negative or criminal activity. Reform school, jails or prisons used to be called reformatories, and simply put, the prefix “re-“ means you didn’t get it right the first time. You have to re-start, re-do, re-move, re-charge…you name it. Reform is holding us back. Trust me on this, I tested it out. I tried the following experiments.

I presented “Mow the lawn” as “Landscape reform” – ordinarily mowing the lawn around here isn’t very popular, but we all grumble and get the work done. When I presented it as “Landscape reform” I was immediately confronted with anger and resistance. “What’s wrong with our current grass length"?” “Can’t we just mow part of the lawn? Maybe the part with the most weeds?” – I immediately saw the rhetoric ramp up when using the word reform. I decided to try it on a positive experience and see if it had the same effect.

I tried “Water immersion reform” – right away everyone was confused and said they didn’t like the sound of it. “How much is it going to cost?” “Will we all have to participate?” I have to say that since I was referring to going swimming, the public option didn’t seem as good. I was able to tie together the idea of pooling resources though.

The last experiment I tried on someone outside the family and the effect was immediate. I decided to use all the “bad” words that have been flying around and see if I could incite a riot. I told the lady at the library that I was working on the “Green tort health initiative” and that we were dedicated to the highest level of reform possible in the area. She shrugged her shoulders and said she didn’t like vegetables anyhow and I could reform the hell out of them.

I think I found problem #2.

Home is where the cart is…

In our two blog house we have a rule, or I just made it a rule, I don’t remember. If we both discuss or come up with a blog topic in the presence of each other we decide who gets to write about it. The add on that I’m coming up with is the following. If you don’t take advantage of that opportunity within 24 hours, the idea is fair game. Since I now have the disclaimers out of the way I’m going to take away a topic from Jen and probably do it zero justice.

Have you ever gone through the mental exercise of wondering what it might be like to be homeless? Maybe I’m weird, but I’ve gone through this exercise numerous times. It’s not that I’m pessimistic about my chances of keeping my mortgage intact, but I have lots of good ideas for homeless people. Disclaimer number 2: I am not making light of homeless people or making fun of them, it’s just that there are some questions and answers that need to be out there. First…why would you stay in Chicago, Omaha, or New York if you don’t have a home? At minimum you should just start walking south. Eventually if has to be an easier task to be homeless in Macon, Georgia than Chicago. Second…I have a question. Do you really make that much money sitting at an intersection? This one is actually something I don’t know. The guy at the Intersection down the road never seems to get enough money to move away from the intersection, so I think it’s a bad plan. Third…I have an idea and it isn’t really related to being homeless, it’s just near the same topic. Could you live in one of those Self storage places? Those things have air conditioning, bathrooms, they are dry, and for the most part they are cheap. I think you can even tap the electricity with a little ingenuity. I even saw one the other day that advertised “free wireless”. I know that the people who own or manage these things don’t want you to do such a thing, but I think if you were sneaky enough you could make it work. Someone come up with the reasons why it wouldn’t work and I’ll see if I can overcome them. In the meantime I’m going to look into renting one part time. I’m going to put a recliner and a TV in there and tell the family I’m going to my second job.

“Stick with me”

It’s been 8 years and we all still miss and mourn our friends, neighbors, and countrymen from 9/11, but it occurs to me that I have a unique opportunity this year to pass on a story. Since I didn’t have this blog until this years anniversary I have never really typed this out. I’ve told some friends and family, but it was just a story like many others had, about the inspiration of someone from “that day”. Since I DO have this chance, this year, I will pass it on to you.

My story is about a relatively ordinary guy….a good guy, who was making his way at my company and through life, trying to climb the ladder and find whatever it is that brings you happiness or success. It took me from 9/12/2001 and beyond to realize, further, what a good guy this was. I was attending my first Team Leader meeting at APC and wasn’t sure what to expect. It was 9/x/2001 is all I remember and I sat next to Shawn Nassaney. I remember he smiled and pulled out the chair for me, so I guess he had assigned me the seat. The meeting was uneventful except for the fact that there was some contentious issue, which I found out later, always existed at these meetings, and everyone was riled up about something. Throughout the meeting Shawn kept joking with everyone and jabbing me when things got heated. He would lean over and make a comment like “Watch this, I’ll really get them thinking” and then he would take whatever counterpoint was out there to take. After the meeting he said to me “Stick with me…I’ll show you how things work around here”. We traded a few jokes and he said that they would have to figure it out without him anyhow because he was going on vacation and it would do them all some good to work it out without him. We had no idea how much we would have to do without him and how much we could have used him and that quick wit and smile.

When 9/11 rolled around it was just another day, just another morning, when the reports started coming in. I had heard on the radio coming into work that a small plane had hit one of the World Trade Center towers and by the time I got to my desk the whole disaster was becoming a lot clearer and scarier. We all remained glued to the computers and TV’s hoping that what we were hearing wasn’t going to get even worse. We all know by now that the day kept getting worse as time went on. I also couldn’t help but notice that some of the other managers and team leaders kept huddling together and meeting in offices and rooms with each other. Being the new guy I kind of figured that my best move was to let them do the heavy stuff and I would work out on the floor and try to keep everyone as calm as I could. I have no idea what time it was or the exact words that were used but everyone on the call center floor was told to put down the headsets and to gather around. The call center director at the time was a 6 foot plus, big, good natured, outgoing sales guy, and as he climbed up on a desk I couldn’t help but notice that he wasn’t himself. He was slumped and looked defeated. He managed to tell us that they had been working all morning to try to dispel the theory that any APC personnel had been involved in any way in the attacks but he had some bad news. Through tears and choked up speech we learned that Shawn Nassaney had been on United flight 175 with his girlfriend Lynn Goodchild and from there I have no idea what he said really. I don’t think I have ever been in a bigger daze than that day. I couldn’t wait to get home to Jen and Sara and possibly hole up in the house until things looked like they might be interesting again.

In the days and years following 9/11/2001 I have always used my memory of Shawn and my brief time with him as a sign that I should not miss opportunities to enjoy life, have fun, and love my family. I learned over the years that this was how he lived his brief life and it has always allowed me to get through subsequent 9/11 anniversaries. I get sad, mad, depressed and all those other things, but I also take time to smile on 9/11 and know that Shawn and the others have inspired so many people to be better and happier. Thanks Shawn.

http://www.shawnmnassaney.org/about/foundation/

Ringo shops here

I noticed that it has been a lot easier to park at one of our favorite lunch spots around Land O Lakes. The thing I noticed second is that it is because half the businesses in the plaza are boarded up. How is it that the crappy old pet store in the same plaza opens up day after day selling parakeets and gold fish, but Quiznos and a liquor store are closed down? I’m always amazed, especially in this economy, that there are certain businesses that are open that make no sense to me. I’m going to have to start taking pictures of them and we can all speculate together what is keeping X store open when Y store closes. Example: There is this little hobby shop down the road. They sell old train sets, remote controlled airplanes, and other gizmos. Right next door is a music shop selling sheet music and drumsticks and not the finger licking kind…unless you’re weird. How do they do it? Maybe I need to sit and talk with the owners and find out.

Calling Johnny Paycheck!

Now this is classic “Why would we want to know about that"?” typing.

I went to the dentist today.

That’s got to be a tough gig for all of the people that work there. Most places you work at least some of the people that walk through the door are happy to be there. I don’t think anyone who walks through the door at the dentist is happy to be there. Think of a reason and pass it on to me. Those people must really get tired of trying to be happy and positive. Even when you leave they make you visit the scheduling lady who gets to hear all about how you don’t want to come back next time and how much your gums hurt right now. Wah. What other jobs are like this?

Endoscopy center? – There are probably people in the world that like that place. No further speculation will occur.

Prison? – I guess some people are going there to visit someone, maybe they are at least saying to themselves, “Glad I don’t have to stay”. The guards might not be thrilled either.

Funeral home?

I could keep thinking about it, but I’m going to try to think of the next thing. Presumably it will be on a more positive note.

Baseball, apple pie, and Batavus…

I’m at one of those points again where I THINK I have nothing to write about, so I just start typing. Things seem a little mundane or I’ve already gone on about whatever is in my head too much. It’s been nice to relax as summer ends here in Florida and we are looking forward to the, usually, temperate fall and winter. I am enjoying the baseball season as the Cardinals have pretty much run away with the division and I’m trying to get Sam into baseball by way of talking him through a game or 10 on TV. He seems to get it, but like most kids, gets bored with it over time. I guess it takes years to appreciate a 3-2 fastball that freezes the hitter and gets an emphatic “Strike 3” from the umpire. We aren’t even close to talking about the squeeze play.

Since most of my posts haven’t had photos to accompany them I am attaching a picture of me and Sam watching a Cardinal game. It is pretty boring, but it has all the elements. Bag of chips, remote control, Cardinal attire, and proper reclination. It’s a new word. More soon….hopefully.

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We should probably call it something else…

Happy Labor day!

I’m not sure I “get” labor day. Sorry if that offends anyone. It’s a lot like throwing your own birthday. Celebrating the American worker. Do the unemployed get upset on Labor day? You’ll notice that there are no labor day songs or specific things you have to do and I think we should find something like that or someone is going to notice that this is a pretty lame holiday. Maybe everyone should go to their workplace parking lot on this day and have their BBQ and picnic. I also think that maybe we should all go to work and work extra hard on Labor day. Seems funny to celebrate the American worker by not working. Oh well. I’ll take it. Enjoy your extra time off.

Charlton? Is that you?

So the NRA called the other day. Seems they need my support. Unfortunately they don’t have a good marketing team. The call starts with a heavily southern accented person telling me that they have a personal message from the President, CEO, Grand Poobah of the NRA and to please hang on the line. I listened to the recorded “personal” message, chuckled, and was ready to hang up when “Bubba” came back on the line and asked me if I would answer a poll question. Since I’m a reasonable guy I said sure. Here is the question.

“Do you want 3rd world dictators and Hillary Clinton to take away your gun rights?”

I told this person that this seemed to be a quite loaded question and then he just repeated it. I asked him what 3rd world dictators I should specifically be concerned about and his answer was “Mexico”. I took just an extra few minutes before hanging up and let him know that A) Mexico is a country, not a dictator, and B) The President of Mexico is not a dictator, but is democratically elected. At this point I decided that arguing with a guy that is obviously concerned deeply about his guns isn’t such a good idea, plus he had my phone number.

Now I don’t care one way or another about guns. I was more interested in the fact that someone organized such a strange event and even worse, someone had to pay for it. Why don’t they just ship me a bunch of money and I’ll tell people that guns are ok, just be careful and don’t shoot anyone with them. Crazy.

The Emperor is all around me

For those of you that don’t know, my home, Land O Lakes, FL, is the nudist capital of the world. I’m not sure how provable this is, but that’s what they say. The reason I mention this is that me and Jen have a running conversation when we think we spot these people. Contrary to what you might expect you don’t spot them because they are the only ones standing in line at the grocery store with all their produce out for everyone to see. We spot them, which is kind of funny, by their clothes. You see….nudists have the worst taste in clothes. Think about it. How good are you going to be at coordinating your outfit if A) You rarely wear clothes and B) You literally don’t like anything you try on? These people obviously don’t spend a lot of money on clothes and very rarely buy new ones, so what you get is a bunch of overly tan people in ill fitting, out of style, crappy clothes. How hard are they to spot now? The challenge is spotting them in Wal-Mart where that description applies to more than nudists. I think it would be hard to be a nudist. I would be watching where everyone sat when they came over and think twice before I sat in the same place and there’s never any change hidden behind the couch cushions. I heard the UPS guys talking one day about delivering packages to the nudist resorts and they said that after one day the interest wears pretty thin. The chances of being unpleasantly surprised greatly outweigh any possible benefits. I’m not sure they will appreciate it, but I’ll get some shots of possible nudists roaming the Land O Lakes streets.

Time wasters

Some funny time wasters…..

http://bestofwikipedia.tumblr.com/ – Some entries on Wikipedia that are interesting, unusual, and sometimes just dumb.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/ – This is destined to be funny…if you can get the site to load. It is apparently so popular over the last few days that you can’t even get it to view. Good luck.

http://maybeyoushouldntbuythat.com/ – I don’t even know what to say about this one…except “Don’t buy these things”

http://facesinplaces.blogspot.com/ – Mildly amusing. This is one of those that makes you think “Really? A blog about THAT?”

http://funnyexam.com/ – Ok, some of these are a bit crude, but others are hilarious.

Take your “oil soap” and get out…

I know it’s called Murphy’s law, but it’s starting to feel a little more personal. Today I decided I couldn’t take it. The pool water level was WAY too low and I needed to address it. I got it to the level that I liked and within 15 minutes the clouds were gathering. Whoever is in charge of such things thought it would be fun to toy with me over a few hours and just as I was starting dinner it started pouring buckets. Tomorrow morning I will be pumping water out of the pool. Don’t tell Murphy, I can’t even imagine how that might go down. Here are a few of the other attacks I’ve suffered over the last few days by Mr. Murphy.

- My bike basket / bag / bungee cord contraption is fine until I am farthest away from home. The tell tale sounds of bicycle tire eating something in the spokes is a scary sound while travelling at 12 miles per hour.

- Today at work I would complete a project and refresh my e-mail only to find another project assigned to me.

- I had also decided that tomorrow was “mow the lawn day”. I’m now trying to decide between a rice paddy or cranberries.

Nuh, nuh, nuh ,nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh…Bagman!

Sorry for the late start today….buried at work.

I wanted to get a quick post in to brag on my geniusness. Another word that spell checker doesn’t like. The other day I tackled the “I don’t have an easy way to transport stuff to and from, here, and there on my bike. I didn’t want to spend $100+ on some bags mostly because I’m cheap and didn’t think it was necessary. After an almost disastrous experiment with bungee cords and a plastic bin, I came upon a plan. I decided to use the bags the groceries come in. No…not the landfill fillin’, can’t get rid of, crappy grocery bags. The ones that they are now selling in most grocery stores to make them feel like they are helping the environment. Anyhow…it took me about an hour or so to make some box inserts for the bags and them attach them to my bike. The next time I’m in Publix I’m going to grab a manager and hit him up for some advertising money.

Take a look.

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